Does Pickup Advice Work This 2021? (w/ Dr. Robert Glover)

Matt: Does Pickup Advice work this 2021? We’re joined by Dr. Robert Glover and he’s going to drop a ton of knowledge on you today, including whether pickup advice is good or bad, whether it actually hurts you or harms you. Whether it can really get you a hot girlfriend or not.

And should you use that old cliche, “fake it till you make it”?

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DOES PICKUP ADVICE WORK THIS 2021?

Matt: We’re going to even talk about why you shouldn’t date a hot woman. Sounds pretty crazy if you ask me, but let’s dive right in.

Josiah: Hey, Robert, I’d like to backtrack to something you said a minute ago, and I really love your term “geeks with techniques.” So when you got out and exited your second marriage and you’re starting to date again, tell us your journey – because for me personally, it was like I found the seduction community and I basically I’m pro “fake it till you make it,” because that’s the path that I took.

Now, had I had other options that might have been I might have done something different. But at the time, that’s all I had. So how is it for you and what’s your thoughts on fake it till you make it?

Robert: Yeah, OK, there’s about four questions there. Let me see if I can kind of parse them apart. You know, there’s no right way to do this. There’s really not. Now, my book, Dating Essentials for Men, I call it the “UN-Pickup Guide to Dating Success.” and I have mixed feelings about traditional pick up.


When I became single, that was when pick up was just really beginning to explode. So, you know, like everybody else, I read the game, you know, got all of David D’Angelo’s dating stuff. What happened is all my clients that I was working with in my private practice, they started giving me stuff, books, DVDs.

I was really kind of before, like, YouTube was so big, but there’s a lot of resources out there. I read the game and listened to some podcast interviews and and then end up getting interviewed by David D’Angelo and ended up getting interviewed by a lot of the people that I listen to. There’s a lot of good information out
there, a lot of good psychological information that works in terms of interaction with the opposite sex.

And my issue with pickup is in the way that it is taught. Now, here’s here’s one thing I’ve also noticed about pickups. I’ve been able to watch it for twenty years.

Most pickup artists evolve over time and kind of get to where like, you know, it really is about being authentic and, you know, and the relationship aspect of it. Even Neil Strauss wrote the Bible of Pickup to then write another book that still looks like a Bible called The Truth and it was all about finding the right relationship. Most of the guys were teaching pick up when I first got single have evolved more into a social dynamic aspect of things – how to be authentic, how to be real, how to move your energy, how to be grounded, how to be embodied, how to set the tone and lead.. All things that I think are really positive.

The parts of that that I don’t like about pickup is that I believe fundamentally where much of his time, I think is demeaning to both men and women.

It often is based around teaching men, “OK, you know, here’s how you get the hottest women out there.” And, you know, I’ve never heard one pickup artist say, “What is the benefit of getting the hottest woman out there?” It’s like we just assume we all know what the benefit of that is.

But there must be some benefit. So what is that benefit? In my mind is primarily egoic, its the man going, “Look at me, I’m not such a loser! I got a hot woman. All the guys are going to think I’m great!” And we think it’s going to lead to amazing sex, we think because that’s male logic. If she’s hot, she must be great in bed. In my personal experience and I’ve talked with a lot of guys, I’ve talked to a lot of women. Often the hottest women have been the most abused. Plus they’ve never had to show up in any way. They’re usually the least accountable, the most entitled and the worst in bed.

Because guys, we’re physical, we’re visual. We want that hot woman. And it’ll make me feel like I’m OK. I think it’s demeaning to us and demeaning to them. It breaks most women down to just accumulation of body parts, you know, the ones with the best genetic inheritance?

All right. That’s the one I got to get because then it teaches how to pick up the most attractive woman in the room and go walk up and talk to her. I think that’s fundamentally invasive. The approach I teach is that if you’re just in a space being yourself and you notice the feminine noticing you. Go talk, go approach, go do something, But just approaching a woman because you like her ass or you like her tits, I tell men I think it’s the worst possible reason to approach a woman.

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You know nothing about her. Guys who say, “Well, but she looks nice.” No, don’t stop lying to yourself. You like her tits, you like her ass. You think those tits will make your life better in some way. That’s really what it is. And it keeps us in a really almost seven year old view of women.

“Oh, they have nice tits. They’re going to make my life better.” I don’t think there’s a God damn thingwrong with those being physically attracted to women. Like, physically attracted to their body parts. I don’t preach against it, but using that as our basis for deciding who we talk to and don’t talk to or who we want to go out with or don’t want to go out with is the worst.

I’ve been doing relationship counseling for over 30 years. I just think it’s the worst possible foundation to build anything long term with. And as I said, contrary to guy logic, it’s also usually the worst possible way to have a good time in bed.

I rather we only go back to helping men be their authentic selves, learning to soothe their anxiety, learn how to get out of their comfort zones, learning to challenge themselves, learning to walk through the open doors that present themselves. If you’re standing next to a woman in line at Starbucks and you just start a conversation
and there’s a mutual interest there. Yeah, get a phone number.

If you’re somewhere at a party with a group of friends, you notice a woman’s looked at you a couple of times, walk across the room and talk to her, but just don’t be invasive because you like a woman’s tits. There’s a reason why hashtag MeToo was so prominent. Women have been invaded by men all of their lives. And so I don’t want to perpetuate that.

BUT I do want to teach men how to walk through every open door of opportunity. And that’s why I’ll bring it back to what my experience was. That’s what amazed me. As I said, I didn’t and I couldn’t believe what planet I had landed on. Women were propositioning me.. They were giving me phone numbers. They were getting naked on first and second dates. And I’m going, what’s happening here? I didn’t realize it worked like this.

It’s not because I was practicing pickup. It’s not because I sitting on the most attractive women in the room. It’s not because I was the youngest, best looking, richest guy in the room. Its because I had a sense of self.


You guys began by asking how old I am. I’m sixty four. My wife is twenty two years younger than me. We’re coming up on four years of marriage and she’s a fairly typical Latina in that she she has that Latina jealousy. And she’s actually is good at noticing women noticing me, women walking in front of me, women bending over, kind of pointing their butt at me, or giving a little cleavage, women touching my shoulder as they walk by.

She’s highly sensitive to that and lets me know it. That even at sixty four, I still draw that kind of energetic attention without me trying. I actually I know how to attract and engage with women. I keep it toned down because I’m married. I don’t want the attention or energy and it still keeps coming to me.

I’m a big believer that we don’t have to learn some some poll question or clever pick up line and walk across the room and find the hottest woman and try to, get her phone number and go, “Yey! I got a number.”

You know, she never calls you back and you ever see her naked, but you got her. No, I never had to resort to that. And again, it wasn’t because I was the best looking guy in the room. There are more effective ways to draw the higher quality women into your life than than using the tricks that pickup teaches.

BUT.. a piece that I do like about pickup is it gets men out of their comfort zone and it gives them gives them a tribe. They find a group of men and they go out together and they go get out of their comfort zone and do the things that scare them.

I’m actually a really big fan of that process, both of getting a tribe, connecting with men and getting out of your comfort zone. I do like that dynamic that that typically occurs in a dating boot camp or something like that.

Matt: Yeah, I think part of the problem, too, is they’re still nice guys and pick up just give them some lines and some things to do or say to look cool and sound cool. But underneath it all, they’re still nice guys. They still have all these issues and baggage and trauma’s that they haven’t dealt with yet, so it’s just a bandaid over the real problem and eventually, usually sooner rather than later,the woman figures it out. “He’s really not as cool he seems.

Robert: And the bottom line, they’re not being themselves. The social dynamic should be that they’re learning is really about being their most bold, assertive self. I love that idea. But if it was about just being phony in a way that gets drunk, twenty two year old women with lots of insecurities to give you a phone number, what have you really gained?

And then as you said, and then if the woman gets to know you and all of a sudden you still have these really underlying fears of “I’m not very interesting, I don’t have anything to talk about, I’m just going to try to give her everything she wants and try to make her happy.” They’ll soon get bored with all that anyway.

Matt: And then if you even if you do sleep with her, then it could give you a false sense of confidence, like you feel great for a little while because you just slept with this gorgeous woman. But that’s not going to last very long because it’s not real confidence.

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How to Touch a Woman | 10 Ways to Touch Without Creeping Her Out

Asking yourself How to touch a woman nowadays? There are TONS of ways to touch her. But do you know how to touch a woman the RIGHT WAY?

Guys are oftentimes scared s^&*less when it comes to touching women. One small mistake and BOOM – no more attraction or worse..A slap to the face.

That is why the team, especially Matt, is dedicating our next few videos to help teach guys how to touch a girl. We’ll cover the proper ways of touching a woman. How to touch her to turn her on, how to touch her without getting creepy, how to touch her like a MAN..

The answers to your “how do I touch her?” are found here – Matt explains the different ways to touch a girl, and the different kinds of touch during the interaction:

Like and Subscribe! Weekly stuff coming out and we’ve got more on how to touch a girl, how to turn her on, how to approach women the right way!


Get the Confidence Booster Cheat Sheet NOW! It has all you need to boost your confidence. Its complete with Challenges and Videos that crush that anxiety, exponentially increase your self esteem, and overall make you a better MAN and a better person – one made to accomplish a lot more in life than just lie in bed and watch videos every day!

HOW TO TOUCH A WOMAN
10 Ways to Touch a Woman without Creeping Her Out

Here are 10 ways to touch a girl starting from the more casual platonic touching and moving up to more intimate forms of touch because just like any form of escalation, you need to start small and increase the escalation over time as she feels more and more comfortable with you:

10. GREETING and SAYING GOODBYE

Handshake – FIRM, STRONG. Not too much, remember to be dominant without being domineering. You want her to feel safe and secure, not like someone who can hurt her. (Don’t crush her hand)

Kiss on the cheek – Depending on the culture, a kiss on the cheek is quite a common greeting. To other countries, its already an intimate gesture. Most of the time when I say goodbye I give a nice kiss on the cheek (that’s if we weren’t smooching already if the date went well)

Hug – When you meet her for a date always hug even if you met online. No hovering hand, okay? A nice bear hug, or if that’s too much, even a side hug works great.

9. CONVERSATION

Using your hands as you talk and touching her arm, shoulder or hand to emphasize a point. Example: “And you won’t believe what happened next” as you touch her arm for emphasis. Touch her waist or lower back at a loud club, which is a very sensual spot of her body, as you lean in to tell her something.

8. UNINTENTIONAL

Examples of situations where Unintentional Touch can happen are:

Standing near each other and your arms are touching

Sitting and your legs are touching 

Being close to each other

Can happen while walking

So if you are looking for a dating location, like a dinner or lunch date – Pick a venue with couches where your legs can touch

7. INQUIRING

Touch her hair, nails, or something she’s wearing and make a comment about it. Example: “Wow those are some interesting nails” as you hold her hands and examine them. Complementing her figure works as well, just like how women use “have you been working out?” as an excuse to touch your biceps. You can say the same line as you touch her abs.Wow, you are so fit” “Flex your arm Make sure she has a flat stomach before you do this. Pinching her belly flab won’t be such a turn on.

6. CORRECTING

Fix something about her like her clothing, hair or posture. Example:Hold on let me fix your shirt. Okay there, much better.

5. PLAYFUL

If you are at a bar or on a date you can play a Fun game-like thumb wrestling or slap hands. At bars it’s all about being playful. 

4. REWARDING

When she does or says something you like, simply reward her with a hug, high-five or kiss. Example: “Nice, high-five!” I know it seems childish but that’s the point. Who doesn’t want to be a little childish every now and then?

3. LEADING

While leading her from one place to the next you can hold her hand, go arm-in-arm or place your hand on her lower back.

2. MASSAGE

Hand massage 

Full massage (learn some techniques; take a class)

1. DIRECT

Where she just knows that you are really attracted to her so you make your move. You typically need a higher level of attraction and compliance for this to work.


Don’t forget the Confidence Booster Cheat Sheet! It has all you need to boost your confidence. Its complete with Challenges and Videos that crush that anxiety, exponentially increase your self esteem. It will overall make you a better MAN and a better person. The one made to accomplish a lot more in life than just lie in bed and watch videos every day!

Cheers for now! If you want US to personally train you, hop on a call with us. APPLY HERE for our MENTORSHIP PROGRAM.

Also, I would like to thank Life Coach Path for the great work they did organizing my recent interview for the National Coaching academy. Keep up the great work guys!

Anxiety Cure: The HELLO CHALLENGE

Anxiety cure? I want YOU to do Jules’ HELLO CHALLENGE…

Its simple, man. And its one way to help cure fear, cure anxiety, improve your social skills, and increase your confidence.

As you can see in the video, the HELLO CHALLENGE comprises you, going out there and meeting people – or simply give them a nice hello. You don’t have to expect a reply, you don’t have to expect them to even react. Just go out there and say hello to them!

By doing this everyday for a set number of days, its guaranteed to improve your communication skills, your confidence, and help you conquer that social anxiety and fear of talking to people.

Confidence is a must in self development. And when is the best way to start? NOW!

Like and Subscribe! We have weekly videos coming out!


Still haven’t had the right feel to get out and talk to women? Try our free training – or better yet, apply for our mentorship.

Of course, these things aren’t learned at elementary or high school. Human interaction isn’t something that’s all learned in a book or a one-time lecture. That’s where our training comes in.

Visit www.theattractiveman.com and see our homepage for more information.

But be warned..

We REFUSE To Work With Guys who:

-Want to hurt women.
-Want to lie to women.
-Want to manipulate women.
-Want to sleep with other guys girlfriends and wives.

We believe women are amazing and fascinating, and deserving of courtesy and respect.

And we conduct all of our coaching from this starting point.

So we expect you to conduct your behaviour in the same manner.

Another important point I want to bring up… This is NOT for the faint of heart.

We’re dedicated to real, everlasting, and life changing results.

So excuses, bad attitudes, and “I can’t do it” will simply NOT fly.

Don’t expect to show up and learn a bunch of theory then do nothing with it.

No, our coaches will tell you everything you need to get started…

Then they’ll put you out there in front of real women…

In real places…

With real results.

We expect full participation.

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How to be a Player (Ethical)

Want to know how to be a player? We can tell you – but let me ask you. What KIND of PLAYER do you want to be? What kind of player is most attractive to women?

Do you want to be the lying, manipulative, disrespectful kind? OR do you have what it takes to be the honest, genuine, ethical kind?

I know what you’re thinking. How can a “player” be the honest type? Isn’t being a “player” all about deception and lies? Well, you probably haven’t really understood what it truly means to be one. And this video will clear things up for you:

Like and Subscribe! Weekly videos are coming and you don’t want to miss that!


Did you get your FREE Conversation Cheat Sheet yet? It has all you need to know about how to keep the conversation going and how not to run out of things to say to women!

We all really have asked the question at some point in our dating life. Since its been held time and time again that some, if not MOST women are attracted to “the player.”

Hope this video cleared things up for you! Till next time, man. Cheers!

Don’t miss out on our training camps and our programs. We’re always ready to help you out! CLICK HERE

Practice Eye Contact Video (Part 2)

Hey man! Use this “Practice Eye Contact Video” to help you master looking into her eyes during a conversation!

Practicing eye contact can be tough especially when you’re not used to doing it. It may sound hard, but it’s actually quite easy with constant practice.

I created this video to help you practice eye contact while talking with girls – so make sure you pay attention to what I say at the start. If you missed Part 1, make sure to watch it first here.

Watch Part 2 of the Video below:

That’s all for now! Stay tuned for part 3 coming soon!

-Matt