Today’s advice comes straight from Dr. Robert Glover himself, author of one of my most recommended books “No More Mr. Nice Guy.”
If you haven’t read the book, you absolutely need to. And I would easily say 90 to 95 percent of our clients who come to us that are unsuccessful with wome, I would definitely classify as “nice guys.”
Nice Guys need to learn the hard way – from experience
Josiah: I see some of the irony that you started off your dating life as a “therapist for the women” got a real degree as a therapist, and then wrote a book about how to NOT be a therapist to women.
Robert: There you go. you you’re good with the irony of things.
Josiah: Hey man, it’s actually how it all ends up turning out most of the time, though.
Robert: For most of us, Yeah. And I often tell people that, I write and teach whatever I’ve struggled with, whatever I bumbled my way through. Degrees are irrelevant its really what have you what have you learned in the process and what have you applied, and how it changes things.
Josiah: Nothing better than life experience to teach you real lessons. And sometimes they come really hard, but you’ve got to learn it that way sometimes.
Robert: The best ones often come pretty hard and hopefully you just treat them that way. They’re lessons. That’s all it is. We’re all, you know, we’re all just out there learning.
Nice guys ALWAYS want things to be perfect with women (It NEVER is)
Robert: And I know so many guys I work with and maybe you guys find that, too. They want to get everything perfect.
You know, they want to have the perfect pickup line. They want everything to go perfectly – perfect opener, perfect texts, perfect date, perfect kiss, perfect smile, blah, blah, blah.
That’s not how life works and especially not how things work with women. Nothing ever goes perfect with women. That’s just the nature of the beast. But nice guys want to get it perfect.
I try to give guys permission. Bumble your way through. It’s OK to make mistakes, to look foolish. It’s OK to crash and burn. Just get up, get up and do it again and learn something each time.
What is a “Nice Guy” (..and why you shouldn’t be one)
Matt: So Robert, for guys reading this, what exactly is a nice guy for you? I mean, it sounds like it’s a good thing. Why is it not such a good thing, especially if you’re a single guy? What are the characteristics and why is it a problem?
Robert: Whether you’re single guy or in relationship, it can be a problem. So my definition of a nice guy is a guy who at an early age, internalized inaccurately the belief that there’s something wrong with him and that he’s got to hide certain things about him from the world.
That’s so he doesn’t get a negative reaction.. and he’ll try to become what he thinks other people want him to be to get love and get his needs met, which, of course, later in life, one of those needs is being sexual.
And and so the nice guy is a chameleon. He’s out there trying to please people looking for external validation and hiding all those things about himself that, again, might get a negative reaction.
And in most cases, the two things that nice guys hide the most are their needs and wants and their sexuality. Try attracting a woman, hiding your needs and wants and your sexuality. It doesn’t work.
So what happens?
What most guys then do is resort to what I call nice guy seduction; because they don’t believe a woman would be attracted to them and want to be with them just the way they are because of their internalized beliefs. That “I’m not good enough!”.. They have to seduce using nice guy tendencies.
Something along the lines of – be really nice and sweet, and not be like the jerks they’ve heard women complain about. Hide their sexual agenda. This is really most of what nice guys do, and it is ironically ineffective.
The think like this: “I know I want a woman to like me and maybe one day get naked with me. So I’ll hide the fact from her that I have any sexual desire for her, you know, because that’ll make me a bad guy and that’ll make the woman not want to be with me.”
So nice guys listen to the woman talk, they try to help her solve her problems, they pay her car payment. Help her sister move.
They’re going to become what I call a “girlfriend with a p***s” or typically is as we would hear it.. end up in the FRIEND ZONE.
And, you know, and if they ever do get the nerve up to ask the woman out, she gets surprised: “What? No, you’re my friend. I had never even thought of you that way.”
And the woman’s telling the truth because the guy has hidden so many parts of himself and tried so hard to please the woman by trying to do the things he thinks that he’s come to believe will make a woman interested in him, usually by being different than the bad men he’s heard his mother or other women complain about, and so he has no life energy,
Why Nice Guys don’t attract the women they like
Robert: So a nice guy. there’s nothing inherent about him that will just attract the feminine, that will create polarity, that will draw to him what he wants.
So he has to go and try to make it happen. And and then typically, when that doesn’t work well and if he’s lonely enough and they’ll go online and start finding, you know, the pickup related stuff.
So he thinks: “I’ll just find a few tricks, some hypnosis.. This will get women to to want to be with me.“
Then they become what I call “geeks with techniques” – is “I’ll do this and women will want to be with me.. I’ll do this and I’ll do this.“
But he’s still not being himself. There’s no him there in that.
And so for me, the most fundamental thing I believe men can do to be attractive to all things feminine, whether that’s opportunity, adventure, money, women, dogs, cats, babies, whatever is to to to be yourself.
What women want (How to be TRULY yourself)
Robert: And as I was sharing earlier, to get comfortable in your own skin, to live life on your terms, to become a social animal, to get out there and just start living a big life and living that big life is amazingly attractive to everything that’s not nailed down.
Matt: That’s all for now, man. I absolutely recommend reading No More Mr. Nice Guy if you haven’t yet. And if you found this content absolutely valuable, share it with your fellow men who you think suffer from the “Nice Guy” syndrome. We’re here to help you guys become the best versions of yourself – and being a nice guy, that’s not you who you really are, man!
Keep up the great work and stay awesome!
Cheers, -Matt
https://media.theattractiveman.com/file/w_700,h_265,c_fit,q_80/blog-images-5-7.jpg265700Matt Artisanhttps://media.theattractiveman.com/file/logo-light-e.pngMatt Artisan2021-01-20 11:01:382021-01-20 11:01:40Why Nice Guys Finish Last | No More Mr. Nice Guy w/ Dr. Robert Glover
Why do you need a porn addiction cure? Did you guys hear the news about the man that died after masturbating sixty two times in a row on Valentine’s Day?!
I guess now we know the magic number is sixty one times! Right? Right? *Cricket Noise*
But jokes aside.. guys always ask each other – “Why would you want to quit porn anyway? I mean, isn’t it just part of being a man? Isn’t it just what we guys do?“
While it seems all innocent and good it actually depletes your motivation to meet and attract women in real life. And when you do have a woman, it makes it really hard to “get it up.” Why? because you’re so used to getting aroused by women in porn videos that you no longer get arousal from women in real life.
It also depletes your dopamine, (the happy hormone) which makes you depressed. So It makes everyday things like seeing the sunrise just seem bland and boring. It gives you unrealistic expectations when it comes to women and sex. It depletes your confidence level, and creates shame and anxiety!
Well, the truth is that you’re likely just making a few small mistakes.. And with some tiny adjustments that I’m about to give you, you can finally stop relapsing and start being super proud of yourself for finally quitting porn for good.
It’s pretty simple. We get that mega-hit of dopamine every time we watch it. Dopamine, the happy hormone, is excreted everytime a “stimulus” is encountered by the body. Like the video and audio you have when opening porn. This hormone is responsible for making you feel great – when your body is used to feel so good when you watch porn, then everyday things like eating your favorite food will pale in comparison to watching it.
This can lead to a dangerous addiction where you’ll feel that watching it is a “need” instead of a “want” and you’ll replace your actual “needs” like food, water, social interactions, self-fulfilment with it instead. The same principle applies to drugs and alcohol. Even video games. Don’t let it replace healthy, positive things in life.
And no, I’m not saying video games are bad. But too much of a good thing is bad for you. If you’re spending 12 hours on a game when you should have been working, studying, or even eating and exercising, then thats a bad habit you need to remove. (Same with watching porn!)
WHAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT:
Just make sure your dopamine levels are high. Do other things that give you fulfillment, have small goals and accomplish your goals on a regular basis every single day and you won’t feel such an urge to watch porn.
# 2 Willpower is Not Dependable
There was a study in Israel that looked at the decision of parole board judges as to why they would let some prisoners get parole and others they would deny. They found a pattern and it had nothing to do with their ethnic background, crimes or sentences.
It was all about timing.
The study showed that the judges were a lot more likely to grant the prisoner’s parole if the prisoner was seen early in the morning or right after lunch. That’s because after a while of making decisions, who gets parole and who doesn’t get parole, the judges would get tired, they would have “decision fatigue“, and it was just easier to deny them parole.
Now the study may have nothing to do with a porn addiction cure, but the same concept of “decision fatigue” is true for porn and other addictions.
When you get exhausted, you tend to make decisions on “auto-mode” and well, porn is an easy way to gratify yourself negatively. You can apply the same principle with drugs and alcohol. Your willpower will get depleted and you will resort to the easy way out the moment you feel tired and stressed.
WHAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT:
Don’t rely on willpower alone. Follow the steps and methods I show in my content to help yourself add extra barriers, like apps and setting changes on your phone and computer. Once your willpower yields, you won’t automatically go for negative things when you have other steps blocking them out.
# 3 Its Too Accessible
Literally just a click away on our phones.
Internet + mobile devices + free porn available on the net = huge temptation, right?
Back then you had to get your hands on some magazines. After that, some VHS’s, then CD’s.. then the internet and when you owned a computer. Next was laptops and finally – smartphones. It became more and more accessible with every new step of technology.
With porn getting more accessible.. the temptation to avoid it obviously becomes even more difficult to even think about getting a porn addiction cure.
WHAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT:
You need to make it harder to access. Take your phone away. Keep it away during times when you are most tempted. Add blockers to your connections to porn. Remove and restrict websites. Do what you can so your access becomes limited. Step 2 below can help you with it.
4 STEPS To Quitting Porn For Good
STEP 1 – Ask Yourself “WHY?”
Sometimes asking yourself questions before doing things is the key to making either good or bad decisions. Even then, when you’ve already made the bad decision (i.e. watched porn) asking yourself these questions will help you learn from it. And hopefully use your experience and answers to get your porn addiction cure. (Never watch porn again!)
Ask yourself:
“Why did you relapse?”/Why did you watch porn?“ “What was the event that led up to you watching porn?”
“What mental state were you in?” “Were you feeling really tired? Were you a little bit depressed?” “Did you just get in a fight with someone?”
“What time of day did you look at it?” “Was it like right before lunch where you really, really hungry or was it at the end of the day right before going to bed?”
And then you need to see if you can stop doing or change the event leading up to watching porn. Maybe you were scrolling through Instagram and you were doing some searches and you saw a lot of attractive half naked Instagram models and that made you a little excited.
And then, of course, one thing led to another. That would mean you either need to uninstall Instagram or at least stop scrolling and looking at Instagram models.
One common factor for a lot of guys is just boredom. Now, that might not be enough. So next you need to —
STEP 2 – Make it Harder to Access
One thing I do when I’m sleeping alone is I put my phone outside of my room because that’s a temptation for me. When I go to bed and I’m looking at my phone, I’m real tired.. It’s just so easy to type in something that I know I’m going to regret later.
So if you know that you’re looking at it on your phone, and it’s a certain time of day, then you need to put your phone away or give your phone to a friend. Or at least put it out of reach.
Maybe it’s on your computer at home because you work from home and you start getting stressed out from work. And it’s just kind of a way for you to take the edge off. If that’s the case, then go to a cafe and work because you’re probably not going to do it there! (If you get thrown out of the cafe or arrested.. Not my fault.You SERIOUSLY have a problem if you watch it in public!)
Another way to make it harder to access is to use a porn blocker. I recommend something like Blocker X for your smartphone. I use it myself and it’s just one extra barrier, even though I know I can uninstall it or just turn it off, it’s just going to take more effort because It’s going to have to be a conscious decision for me to do that.
Changing your identity is a powerful tool to give yourself the strength mentally to destroy your porn addiction. Its one a go-to porn addiction cure! One amazing example is to do this:
Instead of labeling yourself as a “porn addict” change it to “A man who gets fulfillment from real life.” I tell myself every single day. Allow only positive content into my mind and body. I’ve brainwashed myself into knowing this so that I only look at positive things and I only put things into my body that are helpful instead of harmful.
Personally, I don’t believe the whole Alcoholics Anonymous – “Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic!” Because then you have the identity of an alcoholic. Which means you’re going to be more likely to slip up and relapse. Do you think that’s a good identity? “Once a porn addict, always a porn addict?”
I personally believe if your identity is “I’m an alcoholic” or in this case, “I’m a porn addict“, that’s not a very empowering identity. Instead, change your identity to “I’m a man who can conquer anything. And I’m a man who only puts positive content into my body.“
Tell yourself that you get fulfillment from real life, not this fake fantasy world. And don’t say “I’m NOT a porn addict” or “I DON’T watch porn” because then you’re still focusing on porn and your subconscious mind doesn’t hear the “not.“
It just hears “I watch porn“, which is going to make you want to do it.
STEP 4 – Write Down Your Identity & Read It Every Day
Finally, for your final step in this porn addiction cure journey: Write down your new identity right now. Take a piece of paper and a pen right now and writeit down. Then brainwash yourself with this positive, amazing, powerful new identity.
Write it down every single day and read it every single day until it becomes just who you are. Once you do that, even if you relapse, it’s not a big deal because you don’t see yourself as a porn addict.
It just might be one little slip up. Then you go back to living your life – of being a man who gets his fulfillment from his family, his work, accomplishing his goals and beautiful women in real life.
And look, man, if you’re a single guy and you’d some help meeting and attracting beautiful women, check out my channel, my website and my blog – because I know it’s tough and a lot of single guys give up because they don’t want to get rejected.
That is one of the many factors why guys end up watching a lot of porn because it satisfies that need in an easy, accessible, but negative way.
But trust me, man, maybe you haven’t experienced the real thing yet, but the real thing is ten times better.
And whether you’re single or in a relationship, make sure to download my free Confidence Cheat Sheet that will give you eighteen different ways that are proven by science to boost your confidence and help you eliminate fear. In fact, all of the eighteen habits in the Confidence Cheat Sheet will give you a dopamine boost, help you feel better about yourself and increase your willpower, thus making you able to handle temptation.
As you’re overcoming this addiction, the Confidence Cheat Sheet will help you just feel a lot more confident. So download it, man:
That’s all for now man. Hope you found my porn addiction cure helpful. Share it with guys who you think will greatly benefit from it. Keep up all the great work and stay awesome!
See you in my next video and post. Cheers, Matt Artisan
Hey man! Today’s video is all about curing your fear of rejection. The best coaches in the world, like myself, get rejected the most because we approach the most. So then how can a normal guy like you, who’s possibly not yet quite the ladies man, never get rejected?
Well, in this video, I’m going to show you exactly how:
Like and Subscribe for more weekly content coming out!
3 Ways To Cure Your Fear Of Rejection For Good
Look, man, you can’t ever get to a point in life where no one ever says no to you or just doesn’t accept whatever it is that you’re offering them, getting a no, whether it’s in business or sales, friends, family, whatever it is, it’s just a part of life.
Not everyone will want what you have to offer.
So then what can we do to never get rejected?
Well, number one, we can actually minimize the amount of NO’s that you get when approaching beautiful women.
And number two, even more importantly, we can change the way you think and feel about getting a “NO” so that it doesn’t feel like a rejection.
When I first started approaching women during the daytime, I had a huge fear of rejection and it showed up in my approach. They could read it on my face, I’m sure, because I was approaching them with this “Please be nice to me.” Kind of look in my eye. Kind of leaning back like “I’m sorry I interrupted you.”
I was just so afraid they were going to feel like I was interrupting them until I realized I wasn’t interrupting them. I mean, sometimes I was, but even when I was, they absolutely loved it!
And it was like a shift in my brain that I was actually making their day. And even when they weren’t into it, because, of course, not every woman is impressed by my approach.
But what I realized is they weren’t rejecting me as a person. They were just not available!
I’ll give you 3 of my practical mindsets to help cure your fear of rejection:
FIRST MINDSET IS – ITS HER SH*T OR YOUR SH*T
So it’s either her sh**, meaning it’s her world, her reality, what’s going on in her life. It has nothing to do with you.
It’s the fact that she has a boyfriend, so she’s not into it or she’s in a hurry or she had a bad day. She might have just got fired from her job!
One time I had a student on Hollywood Boulevard approach a girl who just got off the phone. It seemed like she wasn’t doing anything. Seemed like a great opportunity. Turns out she got off the phone with the police because somebody just harassed her and molested her.
So needless to say, her reaction wasn’t great, but it had nothing, nothing to do with my client. It had to do with just the situation that had just happened.
You have no idea what her reality is, what her world is. So why take it personal and “Say she rejected ME!” when it has nothing to do with you.. OR it does have something to do with you, meaning it’s your sh**.
But all she knows about you remember is your tonality and your body language, your appearance, the words that came out of your mouth and the way you approached her, like the angle. Maybe you approached from behind and she freaked out.
So it’s just feedback.
The problem is you don’t know what the feedback is because she’s not going to just tell you. She’s not going to say, “Oh, you were talking too fast and you look down and that felt a little creepy or you felt a little needy or you felt too nervous.”
She’s not going to tell you that, which is why it’s so important to have a mentor, somebody who knows what to look for, who can spot those blind spots so you don’t keep running in circles making the same mistakes and keep having women dismiss you and saying no, that they’re not interested.
And you keep doing it over and over again when you can easily have somebody analyze your approach, give you some feedback and you can fix it on the spot.
Look, man, she either has what it takes to date you or she doesn’t.
She has a boyfriend? Doesn’t mean she rejected you, just means she doesn’t have what it takes. She’s disqualified to be a potential lover with you.
If she’s in a hurry. Same thing. She’s disqualified in that moment. You need somebody who’s not in a hurry to have a conversation with them.
If she’s not into you, she’s disqualified.
Do you really want to date a woman that’s not into you? So it really comes down to she’s either qualified, she has what it takes to date you.
She’s a good candidate or she’s not a good candidate. And sometimes it just depends on the circumstances of that moment.
Maybe if she wasn’t so busy, she would be a good candidate. But in that situation, she’s just disqualified. And if she’s disqualified, that’s a good thing. That gives you an opportunity to find someone who is qualified.
Imagine you went on a date with a girl who’s not qualified to date you and you wasted all this time. Maybe you went on several dates. Maybe she became your girlfriend and she just doesn’t have what it takes. She doesn’t have the qualities, the attributes to date a guy like you, you want to find that out sooner rather than later.
So when a girl becomes disqualified, say “thank you”, because now you have an opportunity to find someone who is qualified.
THIRD MINDSET – LEARN TO LOVE THE “NO”
Hearing a lot of no’s, I believe, is what builds character. In fact, there’s no other way to succeed. And there’s so many examples of this in history of successful people who have failed over and over again before they succeeded.
Such as Michael Jordan not making the cut for his high school basketball team.
Jack Canfields best selling book, Chicken Soup for the Soul. It was rejected one hundred and forty four times before it was published.
That’s crazy!
Most people would have given up after a few rejections, less than ten. So don’t be the guy who is digging for gold but gives up right before he finds it.
Back in the day there was a man named Mr. Darby and he had gold fever. So he went to work in Colorado with a pick and a shovel and it was really hard work. But he had desire and he had persistence. After weeks of labor, he finally found a shining ore but he needed some machinery to bring it to the surface.
So he borrowed a bunch of money from his family and his friends to buy the machinery. When the first car of or was mined and shipped to a smelter. The returns proved that they had one of the richest mines in all of Colorado. A few more cars of that ore would clear all of his debts. Then would come the big killing in profits.
But unfortunately, the vein of gold ore disappeared.
They drilled on and on, desperately trying to find gold, all to no avail. And finally, the sad day came when they decided to quit. So they sold their machinery to a junk man for just a few hundred dollars and they took the train home.
Now, some junk men are dumb, but not this guy.
He called in a mining engineer to look at the mine and do a little calculating. The engineer told the junk man that the project had failed because Mr. Darby was not familiar with fault lines.
Calculations showed that the vein would be found just three feet from where Mr. Darby had stopped drilling. That’s exactly where it was found. The junk man took millions of dollars of ore from the mine because he knew enough to seek expert counsel before giving up.
So, by the way, find an expert to help you before you give up on your journey, man.
And also learn to love the journey, not the destination.
So many of us we feel, oh, when I finally struck gold, then I’ll be happy when I finally get that dream girl, then I’ll be happy.
You need to love the journey along the way and learn to love the NO’s because those are getting you closer to your final destination. In fact, Tom Hopkins in his best selling book, The Art of Selling, says you need to learn to love the NO.
What that means is you need to calculate on average, how many no’s does it take to get to a yes, which is a great thing to do in selling as well as approaching women. Does it take you 10 no’s to get a yes when you’re approaching women as far as 10 approaches to get a date?
If so, then every time you get to know, you say, “Hell yes, I’m getting closer to a date. Only nine more to go.” And you allow that to motivate you to move forward.You say, “Hey, she’s disqualified. So what? I’m getting closer to someone who is qualified.”
If you watch the video above, I also have a bonus mindset towards the end.
That’s all for now, man! See you next time!
Cheers, Matt
https://media.theattractiveman.com/file/w_700,h_265,c_fit,q_80/blog-images-2-10.jpg265700Matt Artisanhttps://media.theattractiveman.com/file/logo-light-e.pngMatt Artisan2021-01-02 11:09:582021-01-02 11:10:043 Ways To Cure Your Fear Of Rejection From Women And Dating
Learn how to last longer in bed and have better love making sessions. Coach Matt Artisan talks with Jules Bia and special Guest Ruwan to discuss some great tips for men to last long in bed and be better partners to their girlfriends/wives!
Master how to last longer in bed by following the team and Ruwan’s tips for a deeper, powerful, exciting and definitely more enjoyable love making. Men usually THINK they already know how to be better in bed, but you won’t be here searching for some sex tips if every guy already knows, right?
Lets face it. Sex education really doesn’t tell you how to be good in bed or how to make love with a woman better. The lessons on how to make love with a woman aren’t taught in most schools, because sex advice and sex tips are usually taboo.
Guys end up searching how to have better sex in the internet… AND let me say this, watching p0rn isn’t going to help you – because thats a show. It’s fantasy, and it won’t show you what ACTUALLY happens in REAL LIFE.
HOW TO LAST LONGER IN BED Proven & Tested Tips for Better Love Making
Matt and team talk with Ruwan and discuss how to last longer, have better sex and have better foreplay. We also cover the most frequently asked questions when it comes to sex. Ruwan shares his advice on his arousal control techniques, so you’ll understand how to arouse women, master arousal control, and hopefully use that so you and your partner will have more satisfying love making sessions in bed:
That’s all for now, man. We’ve got amazing content coming out on the channel. We’ve got our podcast episodes, too. Keep posted, keep up the good work, and remember – stay awesome!
https://media.theattractiveman.com/file/w_700,h_265,c_fit,q_80/blog-images-18-2.png265700Matt Artisanhttps://media.theattractiveman.com/file/logo-light-e.pngMatt Artisan2020-11-24 21:37:072021-01-18 21:36:10How To Last Longer In Bed (Proven Tips For Better Love Making)
This time, we’re giving tips on how to look more attractive for men – I’m sharing the top 5 mistakes that make men unattractive to women.
Why did I choose this topic? Oh man.. So many of my students think they’re attractive when they show up on our bootcamps or they have specific things about them that women just find flat out ugly. And if even just one of these applies to you, it can make a huge impact on your dating life and the way women respond to you. So make sure you check it out:
LIKE and SUBSCRIBE for more free weekly content!
HOW TO LOOK MORE ATTRACTIVE 5 Mistakes That Make You UGLY
Truth is, and most dating coaches don’t talk about this – is that women make a snap judgment about you, right? When they see you, I’m talking about within like a millisecond, whether you approach her in person or she sees your online profile. So do you want her to be instantly intrigued and turned on or turned off? That’s a tough question. So stop turning her off and shooting yourself in the foot with these five mistakes:
Number 5 – WILD BROWS
Go look in the mirror right now and check out your eyebrows. Do you have a bunch of hair right here? Is it all wild? All over the place? And like your eyebrow has no end to it? If hat’s the case. Then you need to get some tweezers, and tweeze. Because uni-brows are not attractive. And this especially goes for my Indian brothers out there..
And I say, brothers, I’m not Indian, but I’ve been many times for bootcamps. And you guys treat me so kindly, I feel like a brother to you and I can be straight up and say, if you’re Indian, then these are going to be your best friend.
Now you don’t want to go crazy and have these big arches. I’ve actually gotten my eyebrows done a few times professionally. And they went way overboard. And I kind of had like transvestite eyes with this huge arch. And now I’ve been growing them out because it does look more masculine. Have big thick, full brows. So you don’t necessarily need to be tweezing all around here and creating this big arc. You just need to make sure you don’t have a lot of hair everywhere.
Just take some little scissors and just trim the top. And it’ll show women that you care about your appearance and you’ll just look more attractive. Now. It doesn’t hurt to get them professionally done either. I like to get my eyebrows threaded maybe every other month, which is make sure to tell them you want to look masculine or they might go overboard and give you some McDonald, arches!
Number 4 – FRIAR TUCK
That means you have too much hair on the sides and the back, especially if your hair is thinning, it’s not a good look because it’s going to accentuate the thinning on the top and it’s going to make your head look wider. And yes, I made this mistake myself.
My hair has been thinning since I was about 18 years old. So I have definitely made this mistake in the past where I just had too much hair on the side.
And it kind of makes you look like a clown. Clowns are not sexy. Definitely not the look you want to go for if you’re thinking – “I know how to look more attractive now!”
So if you’re thinning on the top of the best thing that you can do is use a three millimeter attachment to your electric razor and keep your sideS short. Now, if you’re unsure of what kind of hairstyle you should get for your shape of hair, don’t just pick a style that you saw online or in a magazine, pick a style that matches your head shape. And if you’re not sure, go to an expensive barber at least once and get his opinion, and then once he hooks you up with an awesome haircut, all you got to do is maintain it. You can go to a cheaper barber or just do it yourself.
I usually just do it myself. All you need is an electric razor. And by the way, if your hair is thinning on the top, I recommend this product: Toppik.
Just a few sprays of these hair building fibers will camouflage your scalp and make your hair look a lot thicker. You can use it on the front. You can use it on the back.. I made a whole video on what to do. If your hair is thinning, that video gives you my opinion because I’ve tried pretty much everything from hair transplants, to micro-pigmentation, to pills and sprays.. you name it. I’ve probably tried it.
Number 3 – NECK BEARD
Most guys get this wrong, including myself. Look, you’re not supposed to have a bunch of hair all over your neck. That looks sloppy – unless you’re actually growing out a full beard, then nobody’s going to see it.
But the other mistake that I made for a long, long time is, is shaving all the way to your jaw line. I figured, Hey, I want a nice, sexy jawline. And from the front, probably doesn’t look so bad. However, from the side, if you shave your neck all the way up to your jaw line, it’s going to look ugly. And I had no idea until I started reading YouTube comments. It said things like, “Hey man, you gotta let your beard grow out a little bit more.” And I thought, nah, that’s probably not true, but I’ll Google it anyway..
And I checked out some beard experts and they said, “Yup, you were supposed to let your beard grow all the way down under your chin and under your jaw line where your neck actually starts, which is right here.”
So if you’re like me, really, all you need to do is shave just this little bit under here and let the rest go out to either a full fledged, beard or experiment with different length of stubble. And it really depends on your preference. Typically, the more thick your beard is, the more masculine you’ll look.
Look, I love nice, loose and comfortable shirts when at home. But I would never wear a very loose shirt on a date because especially if its extra large. Style is the closest thing to a magic pill for making you more attractive to the opposite sex. And what I mean by that is if you have bad or even average style, and we change up your look, you can go from a five or six to an eight or nine, just like that.
And I always see guys on our bootcamps wearing shirts and pants that are about one or two, sometimes even three sizes too big. And not only does it make them look a lot older, but it also makes them look flat out sloppy. And no woman is going to go “Wow, look at that guy! He knows how to look more attractive than the usual men out there!”
Instead, you’re going to kind of look like a pedophile. In fact, at our last boot camp in Las Vegas, we had a guy wearing a full suit. Now, normally that’s not a bad thing if it’s a well tailored, bad-ass like Tom Ford looking suit. It doesn’t necessarily have to be $5,000. I have suits that are less than a hundred dollars. That looked pretty bad-ass, but it was like two sizes too big. And it just kind of hung off him.
When he approached women, it would just creep them out. I remember another time that I met this guy wearing a suit that was like three or four times too big on him. And he just kind of looked like a clown. He was a business coach. Who the heck would take him seriously? I mean, how could you want to get business advice from a guy who doesn’t even know how to wear a business suit?
Even if you’re not wearing a suit, but you’re wearing t-shirts button up shirts, pants that are too big on you. It’s gonna make you look like a fool.
Look. Even when my dad met his current wife, she almost didn’t go on a second date with him because she said his clothes didn’t fit him properly. Because like I said, women make judgments about how you look. Yeah, you might feel more comfortable in a baggy suit or pants, but imagine you meet the woman of your dreams and she decides, “Nah, I don’t want to go on a date with him..” because you look sloppy and it’s such an easy fix!
Number 1 – THE HUNCHBACK
And number one, and I say this because it’s the most common nowadays is you’re rocking the hunchback. Look, it might not be that bad, but chances are statistically speaking – You normally stand a bit slouched. It’s a subtle thing, but just that inch or two difference makes a huge difference. Because slouching just flat out looks unconfident.
If you want to look more confident, more masculine, like you are the fricking boss – you need to stand, you need to walk and you need to even sit like you’re the boss, which means your back needs to be straight. Its crucial when mastering how to look more attractive to women.
In fact, if you’re sitting stand up right now, go find the nearest wall, put your butt, your shoulder blades and your head touching the wall and then take a step forward. That is how your back should always be positioned. That means don’t look down all the time, too. Like when you’re using your smartphone.
Instead, you got to have your phone up at eye level, which I know looks a little strange. It looks like I’m taking videos of everybody, but who cares if everybody thinks you’re creeping on them? Its better to have perfect posture. Now in another video, actually give you an exercise that will help improve your posture. And I go through a bunch of other habits, things that you do on a daily basis that are making you look ugly:
Once you follow these tips and avoid these 5 things, then chances are you’re going to make a much better first impression, and you’ve definitely learned a thing or two about how to look more attractive. BUT.. you might be doing other things that I didn’t mention in this video that are making you look ugly.
You might need some honest feedback from someone like me or someone on my team, where we can take a look at some of your pictures or even video chat with you in real time and assess your look and your style and give you some feedback and fix the things that you’re doing that are pushing women away so that when you walk up and approach a beautiful woman or a woman sees you on Tinder, she’s going to want to swipe, right?
So if you want to join our mentorship program, then click the link down below where we’ll hop on a call. We’ll assess your situation where you are now, what your goals are, and if it’s a good fit and we can get started right away and give you the feedback that you need. Trust me, man. The feedback from an expert can make a huge difference, not only in your dating life, but just how people in general perceive you and help you feel just a lot more confident in yourself. We’ll help you with how to look more attractive to a woman you’re most compatible with.
And speaking of confidence, I want to give you a free copy of my confidence cheat sheet. That’ll give you 18 specific ways that are backed by science. These are daily habits, simple things you can do on a regular basis to boost your confidence and help you overcome fear. Not only when it comes to approaching beautiful women, but really any aspect of your life.
So get it, man, because who doesn’t want to be more confident and it’s absolutely free.
That’s all for now, man. We’ll have some new content coming out weekly!
So keep up the great work, and stay awesome.
Cheers, Matt
https://media.theattractiveman.com/file/w_700,h_265,c_fit,q_80/2-14-s.jpg265700Matt Artisanhttps://media.theattractiveman.com/file/logo-light-e.pngMatt Artisan2020-11-20 08:41:212020-12-28 19:03:20How To Look More Attractive (5 HUGE Mistakes That Make You UGLY)
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Why Nice Guys Finish Last | No More Mr. Nice Guy w/ Dr. Robert Glover
/0 Comments/in Approaching, Attraction Tips, Confidence, Dating Advice, Inner Confidence /by Matt ArtisanThe reason why nice guys finish last has always been argued. It is especially relevant as it ever was today, when most men are absolutely confused as to how to attract women (and even just have a decent interaction with them!)
Today’s advice comes straight from Dr. Robert Glover himself, author of one of my most recommended books “No More Mr. Nice Guy.”
If you haven’t read the book, you absolutely need to. And I would easily say 90 to 95 percent of our clients who come to us that are unsuccessful with wome, I would definitely classify as “nice guys.”
WHY NICE GUYS FINISH LAST
Nice Guys need to learn the hard way – from experience
Josiah: I see some of the irony that you started off your dating life as a “therapist for the women” got a real degree as a therapist, and then wrote a book about how to NOT be a therapist to women.
Robert: There you go. you you’re good with the irony of things.
Josiah: Hey man, it’s actually how it all ends up turning out most of the time, though.
Robert: For most of us, Yeah. And I often tell people that, I write and teach whatever I’ve struggled with, whatever I bumbled my way through. Degrees are irrelevant its really what have you what have you learned in the process and what have you applied, and how it changes things.
Josiah: Nothing better than life experience to teach you real lessons. And sometimes they come really hard, but you’ve got to learn it that way sometimes.
Robert: The best ones often come pretty hard and hopefully you just treat them that way. They’re lessons. That’s all it is. We’re all, you know, we’re all just out there learning.
Nice guys ALWAYS want things to be perfect with women (It NEVER is)
Robert: And I know so many guys I work with and maybe you guys find that, too. They want to get everything perfect.
You know, they want to have the perfect pickup line. They want everything to go perfectly – perfect opener, perfect texts, perfect date, perfect kiss, perfect smile, blah, blah, blah.
That’s not how life works and especially not how things work with women. Nothing ever goes perfect with women. That’s just the nature of the beast. But nice guys want to get it perfect.
I try to give guys permission. Bumble your way through. It’s OK to make mistakes, to look foolish. It’s OK to crash and burn. Just get up, get up and do it again and learn something each time.
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What is a “Nice Guy”
(..and why you shouldn’t be one)
Matt: So Robert, for guys reading this, what exactly is a nice guy for you? I mean, it sounds like it’s a good thing. Why is it not such a good thing, especially if you’re a single guy? What are the characteristics and why is it a problem?
Robert: Whether you’re single guy or in relationship, it can be a problem. So my definition of a nice guy is a guy who at an early age, internalized inaccurately the belief that there’s something wrong with him and that he’s got to hide certain things about him from the world.
That’s so he doesn’t get a negative reaction.. and he’ll try to become what he thinks other people want him to be to get love and get his needs met, which, of course, later in life, one of those needs is being sexual.
And and so the nice guy is a chameleon. He’s out there trying to please people looking for external validation and hiding all those things about himself that, again, might get a negative reaction.
And in most cases, the two things that nice guys hide the most are their needs and wants and their sexuality. Try attracting a woman, hiding your needs and wants and your sexuality. It doesn’t work.
So what happens?
What most guys then do is resort to what I call nice guy seduction; because they don’t believe a woman would be attracted to them and want to be with them just the way they are because of their internalized beliefs. That “I’m not good enough!”.. They have to seduce using nice guy tendencies.
Something along the lines of – be really nice and sweet, and not be like the jerks they’ve heard women complain about. Hide their sexual agenda. This is really most of what nice guys do, and it is ironically ineffective.
The think like this: “I know I want a woman to like me and maybe one day get naked with me. So I’ll hide the fact from her that I have any sexual desire for her, you know, because that’ll make me a bad guy and that’ll make the woman not want to be with me.”
So nice guys listen to the woman talk, they try to help her solve her problems, they pay her car payment. Help her sister move.
They’re going to become what I call a “girlfriend with a p***s” or typically is as we would hear it.. end up in the FRIEND ZONE.
And, you know, and if they ever do get the nerve up to ask the woman out, she gets surprised: “What? No, you’re my friend. I had never even thought of you that way.”
And the woman’s telling the truth because the guy has hidden so many parts of himself and tried so hard to please the woman by trying to do the things he thinks that he’s come to believe will make a woman interested in him, usually by being different than the bad men he’s heard his mother or other women complain about, and so he has no life energy,
Why Nice Guys don’t attract the women they like
Robert: So a nice guy. there’s nothing inherent about him that will just attract the feminine, that will create polarity, that will draw to him what he wants.
So he has to go and try to make it happen. And and then typically, when that doesn’t work well and if he’s lonely enough and they’ll go online and start finding, you know, the pickup related stuff.
So he thinks: “I’ll just find a few tricks, some hypnosis.. This will get women to to want to be with me.“
Then they become what I call “geeks with techniques” – is “I’ll do this and women will want to be with me.. I’ll do this and I’ll do this.“
But he’s still not being himself. There’s no him there in that.
And so for me, the most fundamental thing I believe men can do to be attractive to all things feminine, whether that’s opportunity, adventure, money, women, dogs, cats, babies, whatever is to to to be yourself.
What women want (How to be TRULY yourself)
Robert: And as I was sharing earlier, to get comfortable in your own skin, to live life on your terms, to become a social animal, to get out there and just start living a big life and living that big life is amazingly attractive to everything that’s not nailed down.
Want to meet and date your ideal woman?
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Matt: That’s all for now, man. I absolutely recommend reading No More Mr. Nice Guy if you haven’t yet. And if you found this content absolutely valuable, share it with your fellow men who you think suffer from the “Nice Guy” syndrome. We’re here to help you guys become the best versions of yourself – and being a nice guy, that’s not you who you really are, man!
Keep up the great work and stay awesome!
Cheers,
-Matt
Porn Addiction Cure: 4 Steps To Overcome Porn Addiction
/0 Comments/in Attraction Tips, Confidence, Dating Advice, Inner Confidence, Sexuality /by Matt ArtisanWhy do you need a porn addiction cure? Did you guys hear the news about the man that died after masturbating sixty two times in a row on Valentine’s Day?!
I guess now we know the magic number is sixty one times! Right? Right? *Cricket Noise*
But jokes aside.. guys always ask each other – “Why would you want to quit porn anyway? I mean, isn’t it just part of being a man? Isn’t it just what we guys do?“
And my answer is – NO! It’s literally one of the worst habits you can have!
While it seems all innocent and good it actually depletes your motivation to meet and attract women in real life. And when you do have a woman, it makes it really hard to “get it up.” Why? because you’re so used to getting aroused by women in porn videos that you no longer get arousal from women in real life.
It also depletes your dopamine, (the happy hormone) which makes you depressed. So It makes everyday things like seeing the sunrise just seem bland and boring. It gives you unrealistic expectations when it comes to women and sex. It depletes your confidence level, and creates shame and anxiety!
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Look, man, for a lot of guys, including myself, quitting porn was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. It can almost feel impossible like the temptation is just too great and it’s easier to just give up and give in. Is there really a porn addiction cure out there?!
Well, the truth is that you’re likely just making a few small mistakes.. And with some tiny adjustments that I’m about to give you, you can finally stop relapsing and start being super proud of yourself for finally quitting porn for good.
Why is it so hard to quit porn?
# 1 The Dopamine Rush
It’s pretty simple. We get that mega-hit of dopamine every time we watch it. Dopamine, the happy hormone, is excreted everytime a “stimulus” is encountered by the body. Like the video and audio you have when opening porn. This hormone is responsible for making you feel great – when your body is used to feel so good when you watch porn, then everyday things like eating your favorite food will pale in comparison to watching it.
This can lead to a dangerous addiction where you’ll feel that watching it is a “need” instead of a “want” and you’ll replace your actual “needs” like food, water, social interactions, self-fulfilment with it instead. The same principle applies to drugs and alcohol. Even video games. Don’t let it replace healthy, positive things in life.
And no, I’m not saying video games are bad. But too much of a good thing is bad for you. If you’re spending 12 hours on a game when you should have been working, studying, or even eating and exercising, then thats a bad habit you need to remove. (Same with watching porn!)
# 2 Willpower is Not Dependable
There was a study in Israel that looked at the decision of parole board judges as to why they would let some prisoners get parole and others they would deny. They found a pattern and it had nothing to do with their ethnic background, crimes or sentences.
It was all about timing.
The study showed that the judges were a lot more likely to grant the prisoner’s parole if the prisoner was seen early in the morning or right after lunch. That’s because after a while of making decisions, who gets parole and who doesn’t get parole, the judges would get tired, they would have “decision fatigue“, and it was just easier to deny them parole.
Now the study may have nothing to do with a porn addiction cure, but the same concept of “decision fatigue” is true for porn and other addictions.
When you get exhausted, you tend to make decisions on “auto-mode” and well, porn is an easy way to gratify yourself negatively. You can apply the same principle with drugs and alcohol. Your willpower will get depleted and you will resort to the easy way out the moment you feel tired and stressed.
# 3 Its Too Accessible
Literally just a click away on our phones.
Internet + mobile devices + free porn available on the net = huge temptation, right?
Back then you had to get your hands on some magazines. After that, some VHS’s, then CD’s.. then the internet and when you owned a computer. Next was laptops and finally – smartphones. It became more and more accessible with every new step of technology.
With porn getting more accessible.. the temptation to avoid it obviously becomes even more difficult to even think about getting a porn addiction cure.
4 STEPS To Quitting Porn For Good
STEP 1 – Ask Yourself “WHY?”
Sometimes asking yourself questions before doing things is the key to making either good or bad decisions. Even then, when you’ve already made the bad decision (i.e. watched porn) asking yourself these questions will help you learn from it. And hopefully use your experience and answers to get your porn addiction cure. (Never watch porn again!)
Ask yourself:
“Why did you relapse?”/Why did you watch porn?“
“What was the event that led up to you watching porn?”
“What mental state were you in?”
“Were you feeling really tired? Were you a little bit depressed?”
“Did you just get in a fight with someone?”
“What time of day did you look at it?”
“Was it like right before lunch where you really, really hungry or was it at the end of the day right before going to bed?”
And then you need to see if you can stop doing or change the event leading up to watching porn. Maybe you were scrolling through Instagram and you were doing some searches and you saw a lot of attractive half naked Instagram models and that made you a little excited.
And then, of course, one thing led to another. That would mean you either need to uninstall Instagram or at least stop scrolling and looking at Instagram models.
One common factor for a lot of guys is just boredom. Now, that might not be enough. So next you need to —
STEP 2 – Make it Harder to Access
One thing I do when I’m sleeping alone is I put my phone outside of my room because that’s a temptation for me. When I go to bed and I’m looking at my phone, I’m real tired.. It’s just so easy to type in something that I know I’m going to regret later.
for you to take the edge off. If that’s the case, then go to a cafe and work because you’re probably not going to do it there!
(If you get thrown out of the cafe or arrested.. Not my fault. You SERIOUSLY have a problem if you watch it in public!)
DOWNLOAD BLOCKER X FOR FREE HERE
STEP 3 – Change Your Identity
Changing your identity is a powerful tool to give yourself the strength mentally to destroy your porn addiction. Its one a go-to porn addiction cure! One amazing example is to do this:
Personally, I don’t believe the whole Alcoholics Anonymous – “Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic!” Because then you have the identity of an alcoholic. Which means you’re going to be more likely to slip up and relapse. Do you think that’s a good identity? “Once a porn addict, always a porn addict?”
I personally believe if your identity is “I’m an alcoholic” or in this case, “I’m a porn addict“, that’s not a very empowering identity. Instead, change your identity to “I’m a man who can conquer anything. And I’m a man who only puts positive content into my body.“
Tell yourself that you get fulfillment from real life, not this fake fantasy world. And don’t say “I’m NOT a porn addict” or “I DON’T watch porn” because then you’re still focusing on porn and your subconscious mind doesn’t hear the “not.“
It just hears “I watch porn“, which is going to make you want to do it.
STEP 4 – Write Down Your Identity & Read It Every Day
Finally, for your final step in this porn addiction cure journey: Write down your new identity right now. Take a piece of paper and a pen right now and writeit down. Then brainwash yourself with this positive, amazing, powerful new identity.
Write it down every single day and read it every single day until it becomes just who you are. Once you do that, even if you relapse, it’s not a big deal because you don’t see yourself as a porn addict.
And look, man, if you’re a single guy and you’d some help meeting and attracting beautiful women, check out my channel, my website and my blog – because I know it’s tough and a lot of single guys give up because they don’t want to get rejected.
APPLY HERE FOR OUR COACHING PROGRAMS
That is one of the many factors why guys end up watching a lot of porn because it satisfies that need in an easy, accessible, but negative way.
But trust me, man, maybe you haven’t experienced the real thing yet, but the real thing is ten times better.
And whether you’re single or in a relationship, make sure to download my free Confidence Cheat Sheet that will give you eighteen different ways that are proven by science to boost your confidence and help you eliminate fear. In fact, all of the eighteen habits in the Confidence Cheat Sheet will give you a dopamine boost, help you feel better about yourself and increase your willpower, thus making you able to handle temptation.
As you’re overcoming this addiction, the Confidence Cheat Sheet will help you just feel a lot more confident. So download it, man:
That’s all for now man. Hope you found my porn addiction cure helpful. Share it with guys who you think will greatly benefit from it.
Keep up all the great work and stay awesome!
See you in my next video and post.
Cheers,
Matt Artisan
3 Ways To Cure Your Fear Of Rejection From Women And Dating
/0 Comments/in Approaching, Attraction Tips, Confidence, Inner Confidence, Leadership /by Matt ArtisanHey man! Today’s video is all about curing your fear of rejection. The best coaches in the world, like myself, get rejected the most because we approach the most. So then how can a normal guy like you, who’s possibly not yet quite the ladies man, never get rejected?
Well, in this video, I’m going to show you exactly how:
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3 Ways To Cure Your Fear Of Rejection For Good
Look, man, you can’t ever get to a point in life where no one ever says no to you or just doesn’t accept whatever it is that you’re offering them,
getting a no, whether it’s in business or sales, friends, family, whatever it is, it’s just a part of life.
Not everyone will want what you have to offer.
So then what can we do to never get rejected?
Well, number one, we can actually minimize the amount of NO’s that you get when approaching beautiful women.
And number two, even more importantly, we can change the way you think and feel about getting a “NO” so that it doesn’t feel like a rejection.
And it was like a shift in my brain that I was actually making their day. And even when they weren’t into it, because, of course, not every woman is impressed by my approach.
But what I realized is they weren’t rejecting me as a person. They were just not available!
I’ll give you 3 of my practical mindsets to help cure your fear of rejection:
FIRST MINDSET IS – ITS HER SH*T OR YOUR SH*T
So it’s either her sh**, meaning it’s her world, her reality, what’s going on in her life. It has nothing to do with you.
It’s the fact that she has a boyfriend, so she’s not into it or she’s in a hurry or she had a bad day. She might have just got fired from her job!
So needless to say, her reaction wasn’t great, but it had nothing, nothing to do with my client. It had to do with just the situation
that had just happened.
You have no idea what her reality is, what her world is. So why take it personal and “Say she rejected ME!” when it has nothing to do with you.. OR it does have something to do with you, meaning it’s your sh**.
But all she knows about you remember is your tonality and your body language, your appearance, the words that came out of your mouth and the way you approached her, like the angle. Maybe you approached from behind and she freaked out.
So it’s just feedback.
The problem is you don’t know what the feedback is because she’s not going to just tell you. She’s not going to say, “Oh, you were talking too fast and you look down and that felt a little creepy or you felt a little needy or you felt too nervous.”
She’s not going to tell you that, which is why it’s so important to have a mentor, somebody who knows what to look for, who can spot those blind spots so you don’t keep running in circles making the same mistakes and keep having women dismiss you and saying no, that they’re not interested.
And you keep doing it over and over again when you can easily have somebody analyze your approach, give you some feedback and you can fix it on the spot.
CLICK HERE TO APPLY FOR OUR COACHING PROGRAMS
SECOND MINDSET – SHE’S QUALIFIED OR DISQUALIFIED
Look, man, she either has what it takes to date you or she doesn’t.
She has a boyfriend? Doesn’t mean she rejected you, just means she doesn’t have what it takes. She’s disqualified to be a potential lover with you.
If she’s in a hurry. Same thing. She’s disqualified in that moment. You need somebody who’s not in a hurry to have a conversation with them.
If she’s not into you, she’s disqualified.
Do you really want to date a woman that’s not into you? So it really comes down to she’s either qualified, she has what
it takes to date you.
She’s a good candidate or she’s not a good candidate. And sometimes it just depends on the circumstances of that moment.
Maybe if she wasn’t so busy, she would be a good candidate. But in that situation, she’s just disqualified. And if she’s disqualified, that’s a good thing. That gives you an opportunity to find someone who is qualified.
Imagine you went on a date with a girl who’s not qualified to date you and you wasted all this time. Maybe you went on several dates. Maybe she became your girlfriend and she just doesn’t have what it takes. She doesn’t have the qualities, the attributes to date a guy like you, you want to find that out sooner rather than later.
So when a girl becomes disqualified, say “thank you”, because now you have an opportunity to find someone who is qualified.
THIRD MINDSET – LEARN TO LOVE THE “NO”
Hearing a lot of no’s, I believe, is what builds character. In fact, there’s no other way to succeed. And there’s so many examples of this in history of successful people who have failed over and over again before they succeeded.
Such as Michael Jordan not making the cut for his high school basketball team.
Jack Canfields best selling book, Chicken Soup for the Soul. It was rejected one hundred and forty four times before it was published.
That’s crazy!
Most people would have given up after a few rejections, less than ten. So don’t be the guy who is digging for gold but gives up right before he finds it.
Back in the day there was a man named Mr. Darby and he had gold fever. So he went to work in Colorado with a pick and a shovel and it was really hard work. But he had desire and he had persistence. After weeks of labor, he finally found a shining ore but he needed some machinery to bring it to the surface.
So he borrowed a bunch of money from his family and his friends to buy the machinery. When the first car of or was mined and shipped to a smelter. The returns proved that they had one of the richest mines in all of Colorado. A few more cars of that ore would clear all of his debts. Then would come the big killing in profits.
But unfortunately, the vein of gold ore disappeared.
They drilled on and on, desperately trying to find gold, all to no avail. And finally, the sad day came when they decided to quit. So they sold their machinery to a junk man for just a few hundred dollars and they took the train home.
Now, some junk men are dumb, but not this guy.
He called in a mining engineer to look at the mine and do a little calculating. The engineer told the junk man that the project had failed because Mr. Darby was not familiar with fault lines.
Calculations showed that the vein would be found just three feet from where Mr. Darby had stopped drilling. That’s exactly where it was found. The junk man took millions of dollars of ore from the mine because he knew enough to seek expert counsel before giving up.
So, by the way, find an expert to help you before you give up on your journey, man.
And also learn to love the journey, not the destination.
So many of us we feel, oh, when I finally struck gold, then I’ll be happy when I finally get that dream girl, then I’ll be happy.
You need to love the journey along the way and learn to love the NO’s because those are getting you closer to your final destination. In fact, Tom Hopkins in his best selling book, The Art of Selling, says you need to learn to love the NO.
What that means is you need to calculate on average, how many no’s does it take to get to a yes, which is a great thing to do in selling as well as approaching women. Does it take you 10 no’s to get a yes when you’re approaching women as far as 10 approaches to get a date?
If so, then every time you get to know, you say, “Hell yes, I’m getting closer to a date. Only nine more to go.” And you allow that to motivate you to move forward.You say, “Hey, she’s disqualified. So what? I’m getting closer to someone who is qualified.”
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If you watch the video above, I also have a bonus mindset towards the end.
That’s all for now, man! See you next time!
Cheers,
Matt
How To Last Longer In Bed (Proven Tips For Better Love Making)
/0 Comments/in Attraction Tips, Sexuality, Uncategorized /by Matt ArtisanLearn how to last longer in bed and have better love making sessions. Coach Matt Artisan talks with Jules Bia and special Guest Ruwan to discuss some great tips for men to last long in bed and be better partners to their girlfriends/wives!
Master how to last longer in bed by following the team and Ruwan’s tips for a deeper, powerful, exciting and definitely more enjoyable love making. Men usually THINK they already know how to be better in bed, but you won’t be here searching for some sex tips if every guy already knows, right?
CLICK HERE FOR RUWAN’s FREE AROUSAL CONTROL SECRETS COURSE!
Lets face it. Sex education really doesn’t tell you how to be good in bed or how to make love with a woman better. The lessons on how to make love with a woman aren’t taught in most schools, because sex advice and sex tips are usually taboo.
Guys end up searching how to have better sex in the internet… AND let me say this, watching p0rn isn’t going to help you – because thats a show. It’s fantasy, and it won’t show you what ACTUALLY happens in REAL LIFE.
HOW TO LAST LONGER IN BED
Proven & Tested Tips for Better Love Making
Matt and team talk with Ruwan and discuss how to last longer, have better sex and have better foreplay. We also cover the most frequently asked questions when it comes to sex. Ruwan shares his advice on his arousal control techniques, so you’ll understand how to arouse women, master arousal control, and hopefully use that so you and your partner will have more satisfying love making sessions in bed:
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We’ve got tons more content out our YouTube Channel. So if you want to learn more about attracting women, go and give it a watch HERE.
If you want to listen more to our Podcast, you can find us on Spotify or iTunes/Apple Podcasts!
That’s all for now, man. We’ve got amazing content coming out on the channel. We’ve got our podcast episodes, too. Keep posted, keep up the good work, and remember – stay awesome!
Cheers,
Matt
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How To Look More Attractive (5 HUGE Mistakes That Make You UGLY)
/0 Comments/in Attraction Tips, Dating Advice, Inner Confidence /by Matt ArtisanThis time, we’re giving tips on how to look more attractive for men – I’m sharing the top 5 mistakes that make men unattractive to women.
Why did I choose this topic? Oh man.. So many of my students think they’re attractive when they show up on our bootcamps or they have specific things about them that women just find flat out ugly. And if even just one of these applies to you, it can make a huge impact on your dating life and the way women respond to you. So make sure you check it out:
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HOW TO LOOK MORE ATTRACTIVE
5 Mistakes That Make You UGLY
Truth is, and most dating coaches don’t talk about this – is that women make a snap judgment about you, right? When they see you, I’m talking about within like a millisecond, whether you approach her in person or she sees your online profile. So do you want her to be instantly intrigued and turned on or turned off? That’s a tough question. So stop turning her off and shooting yourself in the foot with these five mistakes:
Number 5 – WILD BROWS
Go look in the mirror right now and check out your eyebrows. Do you have a bunch of hair right here? Is it all wild? All over the place? And like your eyebrow has no end to it? If hat’s the case. Then you need to get some tweezers, and tweeze. Because uni-brows are not attractive. And this especially goes for my Indian brothers out there..
And I say, brothers, I’m not Indian, but I’ve been many times for bootcamps. And you guys treat me so kindly, I feel like a brother to you and I can be straight up and say, if you’re Indian, then these are going to be your best friend.
Now you don’t want to go crazy and have these big arches. I’ve actually gotten my eyebrows done a few times professionally. And they went way overboard. And I kind of had like transvestite eyes with this huge arch. And now I’ve been growing them out because it does look more masculine. Have big thick, full brows. So you don’t necessarily need to be tweezing all around here and creating this big arc. You just need to make sure you don’t have a lot of hair everywhere.
Just take some little scissors and just trim the top. And it’ll show women that you care about your appearance and you’ll just look more attractive. Now. It doesn’t hurt to get them professionally done either. I like to get my eyebrows threaded maybe every other month, which is make sure to tell them you want to look masculine or they might go overboard and give you some McDonald, arches!
Number 4 – FRIAR TUCK
That means you have too much hair on the sides and the back, especially if your hair is thinning, it’s not a good look because it’s going to accentuate the thinning on the top and it’s going to make your head look wider. And yes, I made this mistake myself.
My hair has been thinning since I was about 18 years old. So I have definitely made this mistake in the past where I just had too much hair on the side.
And it kind of makes you look like a clown. Clowns are not sexy. Definitely not the look you want to go for if you’re thinking – “I know how to look more attractive now!”
So if you’re thinning on the top of the best thing that you can do is use a three millimeter attachment to your electric razor and keep your sideS short. Now, if you’re unsure of what kind of hairstyle you should get for your shape of hair, don’t just pick a style that you saw online or in a magazine, pick a style that matches your head shape. And if you’re not sure, go to an expensive barber at least once and get his opinion, and then once he hooks you up with an awesome haircut, all you got to do is maintain it. You can go to a cheaper barber or just do it yourself.
I usually just do it myself. All you need is an electric razor. And by the way, if your hair is thinning on the top, I recommend this product: Toppik.
Just a few sprays of these hair building fibers will camouflage your scalp and make your hair look a lot thicker. You can use it on the front. You can use it on the back.. I made a whole video on what to do. If your hair is thinning, that video gives you my opinion because I’ve tried pretty much everything from hair transplants, to micro-pigmentation, to pills and sprays.. you name it. I’ve probably tried it.
Number 3 – NECK BEARD
Most guys get this wrong, including myself. Look, you’re not supposed to have a bunch of hair all over your neck. That looks sloppy – unless you’re actually growing out a full beard, then nobody’s going to see it.
But the other mistake that I made for a long, long time is, is shaving all the way to your jaw line. I figured, Hey, I want a nice, sexy jawline. And from the front, probably doesn’t look so bad. However, from the side, if you shave your neck all the way up to your jaw line, it’s going to look ugly. And I had no idea until I started reading YouTube comments. It said things like, “Hey man, you gotta let your beard grow out a little bit more.” And I thought, nah, that’s probably not true, but I’ll Google it anyway..
And I checked out some beard experts and they said, “Yup, you were supposed to let your beard grow all the way down under your chin and under your jaw line where your neck actually starts, which is right here.”
So if you’re like me, really, all you need to do is shave just this little bit under here and let the rest go out to either a full fledged, beard or experiment with different length of stubble. And it really depends on your preference. Typically, the more thick your beard is, the more masculine you’ll look.
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Number 2 – “OLD DAD” STYLE
Look, I love nice, loose and comfortable shirts when at home. But I would never wear a very loose shirt on a date because especially if its extra large. Style is the closest thing to a magic pill for making you more attractive to the opposite sex. And what I mean by that is if you have bad or even average style, and we change up your look, you can go from a five or six to an eight or nine, just like that.
And I always see guys on our bootcamps wearing shirts and pants that are about one or two, sometimes even three sizes too big. And not only does it make them look a lot older, but it also makes them look flat out sloppy. And no woman is going to go “Wow, look at that guy! He knows how to look more attractive than the usual men out there!”
Instead, you’re going to kind of look like a pedophile. In fact, at our last boot camp in Las Vegas, we had a guy wearing a full suit. Now, normally that’s not a bad thing if it’s a well tailored, bad-ass like Tom Ford looking suit. It doesn’t necessarily have to be $5,000. I have suits that are less than a hundred dollars. That looked pretty bad-ass, but it was like two sizes too big. And it just kind of hung off him.
When he approached women, it would just creep them out. I remember another time that I met this guy wearing a suit that was like three or four times too big on him. And he just kind of looked like a clown. He was a business coach. Who the heck would take him seriously? I mean, how could you want to get business advice from a guy who doesn’t even know how to wear a business suit?
Even if you’re not wearing a suit, but you’re wearing t-shirts button up shirts, pants that are too big on you. It’s gonna make you look like a fool.
Look. Even when my dad met his current wife, she almost didn’t go on a second date with him because she said his clothes didn’t fit him properly. Because like I said, women make judgments about how you look. Yeah, you might feel more comfortable in a baggy suit or pants, but imagine you meet the woman of your dreams and she decides, “Nah, I don’t want to go on a date with him..” because you look sloppy and it’s such an easy fix!
Number 1 – THE HUNCHBACK
And number one, and I say this because it’s the most common nowadays is you’re rocking the hunchback. Look, it might not be that bad, but chances are statistically speaking – You normally stand a bit slouched. It’s a subtle thing, but just that inch or two difference makes a huge difference. Because slouching just flat out looks unconfident.
If you want to look more confident, more masculine, like you are the fricking boss – you need to stand, you need to walk and you need to even sit like you’re the boss, which means your back needs to be straight. Its crucial when mastering how to look more attractive to women.
In fact, if you’re sitting stand up right now, go find the nearest wall, put your butt, your shoulder blades and your head touching the wall and then take a step forward. That is how your back should always be positioned. That means don’t look down all the time, too. Like when you’re using your smartphone.
Instead, you got to have your phone up at eye level, which I know looks a little strange. It looks like I’m taking videos of everybody, but who cares if everybody thinks you’re creeping on them? Its better to have perfect posture. Now in another video, actually give you an exercise that will help improve your posture. And I go through a bunch of other habits, things that you do on a daily basis that are making you look ugly:
Once you follow these tips and avoid these 5 things, then chances are you’re going to make a much better first impression, and you’ve definitely learned a thing or two about how to look more attractive. BUT.. you might be doing other things that I didn’t mention in this video that are making you look ugly.
You might need some honest feedback from someone like me or someone on my team, where we can take a look at some of your pictures or even video chat with you in real time and assess your look and your style and give you some feedback and fix the things that you’re doing that are pushing women away so that when you walk up and approach a beautiful woman or a woman sees you on Tinder, she’s going to want to swipe, right?
So if you want to join our mentorship program, then click the link down below where we’ll hop on a call. We’ll assess your situation where you are now, what your goals are, and if it’s a good fit and we can get started right away and give you the feedback that you need. Trust me, man. The feedback from an expert can make a huge difference, not only in your dating life, but just how people in general perceive you and help you feel just a lot more confident in yourself. We’ll help you with how to look more attractive to a woman you’re most compatible with.
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And speaking of confidence, I want to give you a free copy of my confidence cheat sheet. That’ll give you 18 specific ways that are backed by science. These are daily habits, simple things you can do on a regular basis to boost your confidence and help you overcome fear. Not only when it comes to approaching beautiful women, but really any aspect of your life.
So get it, man, because who doesn’t want to be more confident and it’s absolutely free.
That’s all for now, man. We’ll have some new content coming out weekly!
So keep up the great work, and stay awesome.
Cheers,
Matt