Dating is like a dance between the prey and the predator. You may not know this, but women actually want to be caught and devoured but by the right man!
To find the right man, women are instinctually and subconsciously looking for specific traits in men they meet.
So all you need to do then is know what those things are and how to embody them so that you can have her wanting you more without having to try and convince her!
I’m Renee Slansky with The Attractive Man Team, and I’m going to give you 5 things that women instantly look for in a man on a first date:
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HOW TO IMPRESS A GIRL
5 Things Women Instantly Look for in Men
How to Impress a Girl: The First Date
Ok so first dates really matter and here’s why; this is where you are giving your first impression. And just because you like the girl and want a second date, doesn’t mean she is going to feel the same….UNLESS you know what she is looking for and able to tap into that, triggering her response to want to know you more.
Not going to lie, what I’m about to reveal to you is pretty much what most women are looking for in a first date, and truth be told it’s not as complicated or as scary as you think.
So let’s unlock the vault and jump in:
Here is what women are looking for – someone who can protect, provide, lead, love and listen ( in a nutshell) and here is how that translates to the first date:
1: Confidence – not just in your appearance and body language but also in your actions, words, and decisions. We don’t want ego, but we do want a man who we feel has a sense of direction and is able to take charge and lead. This really comes across more in your energy and presence …if you can walk into a room and have a sense of confidence and leadership about you without coming across as arrogant, then we will swoon.
2: Decisiveness – nothing sexier than a man with a plan who can just make decisions and lead the way. We want to know you are able to help us and be the man we crave and that comes across so easily if you take decisions ( like ordering the wine or choosing the restaurant etc) …again you come across as a leader who can take control. And it makes us feel like a damsel…it also gives us a hint you can take control in the bedroom
3: Security – we want to feel safe to be ourselves and not be compared to other women. Whilst we also want to feel you could protect us physically and care about our safety. If you come across too domineering then we can feel unsafe in your presence and want to retreat. But if you shrink back from the confrontation hiding behind us then we won’t see you as a man who can fulfill our primal needs to be kept safe.
4: Listening skills – If you can actively show interest in what we are saying it makes us feel like a priority. It also sends the signal that you care about what we say and who we are which are indications of the ability to love. And listening also makes us feel safer around you and being able to trust and open up to you.
5: Chivalry – we don’t want a hero, but we do want a man who makes us feel like a lady. Simple things like opening the door for us, pouring the water, taking the bill, are all signs that you want to make us feel valued and special. It’s also an indication that you have the possibility to give us romance which is what women crave.
Final Thoughts
The thing is guys, tapping into what makes us tick makes us also want to do the same for you. Relationships aren’t just about giving so you can get, but by stepping up and playing your role so that you can build a solid foundation right from the first date.
The amount of women that are literally out there looking for just these 5 basics is incredible. So if you want to set yourself apart from the others and get her thinking about you, all you have to do is focus on those 5 things to create a lasting first impression.
When you are on the date, a woman wants a man who isn’t afraid to make a move, that’s why we created…
The ESCALATION CHEAT SHEET:
Download the Escalation Cheat Sheet for more on what to say to take things to the next level!
We created a “Free Escalation Cheat Sheet” that lists out some of our best ways to spark sexual tension and escalate to the bedroom.
It’s filled with Advanced Escalation Techniques that will help you turn a platonic – friendly interaction, into a more sexual – “I want to rip your clothes off” vibe.
This is very useful when you’re talking to a girl but it’s going nowhere.
Also, if you’re not subscribed, HIT THAT SUBSCRIBE BUTTON!… and if you want us to personally show you how to meet women, check out our boot camp schedule.
I’m Renee Slanksy for The Attractive Man and I’ll see you in my next video!
Bye for now!
Frequently Asked Questions
You cannot make someone fall in love on command, but you can create the conditions for a genuine connection to grow. Be confident, kind, emotionally available, and genuinely interested in getting to know her. Make her feel comfortable and respected, communicate openly, take care of your appearance, and build positive experiences together. Most importantly, let attraction develop naturally rather than trying to manipulate her feelings.
There is no guaranteed way to create instant attraction, but you can make a strong first impression quickly. Stand confidently, maintain natural eye contact, smile, and keep your body language relaxed and open. Avoid appearing desperate or trying too hard to impress her. Being comfortable in your own skin and showing genuine interest can make you more approachable and attractive.
A strong emotional connection often develops through trust, respect, communication, shared experiences, and consistent effort. Confidence, humor, kindness, emotional maturity, and having a clear direction in life can also contribute to attraction. Rather than trying to use a specific trick, focus on becoming someone she genuinely enjoys and feels comfortable being around.
Your body language can communicate confidence before you say anything. Maintain comfortable eye contact, smile naturally, stand with good posture, and avoid closed-off or nervous movements. Being relaxed and present can make you appear more confident and approachable. However, body language should complement genuine conversation rather than replace it.
Natural eye contact can help communicate confidence, attention, and interest. The key is moderation: hold her gaze naturally, occasionally look away, and avoid staring. If she maintains eye contact, smiles, or continues engaging with you, those can be signs that she is comfortable with the interaction.
Focus on having your own life, interests, goals, and social circle rather than making one person the center of your attention. Show interest without constantly seeking reassurance or sending excessive messages. Confidence means being comfortable expressing your interest while also respecting her space and allowing the connection to develop naturally.
Start by creating a comfortable interaction. Show genuine curiosity about her, listen to what she says, use appropriate humor, and communicate your interest confidently. Good grooming, relaxed body language, and a positive attitude can also help create a strong first impression. Attraction usually becomes stronger through repeated positive interactions rather than one perfect line or technique.
Under the subject of Chivalry, she says women still need it. She says if they don’t want it, try anyway. Well, women only give me one chance to please/not please them, so if I fail at any being chivalrous and she is too modern, I blow it.
I’m glad she made the distinction between active and passive listening. For the last 30 years, women keep saying “JUST listen” . If I ask questions, I am talking and not listening, so the ladies don’t want us to JUST listen. As usual, they don’t know how to express their desires