how to get out of the friend zone

How To Get Out Of The Friend Zone

Hate it when women want you to be “just friends“?! Don’t worry, we’ll show you how to get out of the friend zone!

Getting out of the friend zone isn’t about a magic one-liner or single move. It’s a careful, gradual, step by step process. I will show you how to make it work.



How To Get Out Of The Friend Zone With 3 Simple Steps

You’re friends with a beautiful girl that you’ve known for many years, and you finally want to make a move, or maybe there’s this one girl in your social circle that treats you like a friend – and you have no idea how to turn around that friendly vibe into something more romantic.

Let me break it to you: there’s hope! You can turn things around in certain social situations. But first keep in mind that it’s also great to have fun female friends that can also be your wing girls. If she just isn’t into you then she can just be your wing woman out in the club or introduce you to her single friends.

Another point before we go into the tactics: sometimes feeling that you’re stuck in the friend zone simply means that you are focusing too much on one particular woman, and the best advice for you is to just go out there and approach new women. It’s often a lot easier to meet new women and establish a flirty, sensual vibe from the start, than trying to turn a friendly vibe that you’ve had for months or years into a romantic vibe.

However, if you decide you DO want to turn that friend of yours into a lover…

Then I’m going to break it down to you step by step.

First, you need to understand what got you there in the first place.

Most guys get themselves in this situation by being too nice, too passive, and because they were afraid to show their desire for her. In other words, they’re not being a fucking man. 

Look, man, if we examine the type of men women instinctively want to sleep with, it’s the guys that own their masculinity. They aren’t ashamed to show their desire for a woman they like. Think about it, most men are attracted to very feminine women right, and in the same context, most women get turned on by very masculine men.

Guys that say and do what they want. Guys that don’t take shit from anyone. Guys that aren’t looking for her approval. And guys that don’t apologize for their romantic interest in a woman they desire.

So what do you need to do differently? The easy answer: you need to move from a friendship vibe to a lover vibe and stop being afraid to be a fucking man that shows his desire for women. However, that doesn’t mean, you should totally transform who you are and how you act around her, overnight. That’s weird.

If the next time you see her you’re being all touchy and flirty, and making all kinds of sensual innuendos, she will most likely be deeply disturbed and think you are creepy. It will feel very forced. You can’t change who you are that quickly. It has to feel natural.

However, if you want to make her feel more attraction towards you; You do need to make changes. But with small steps at a time, over an extended period of time.

Let me be upfront. This will take discipline. But if you’re serious about getting out of the Friend Zone, this is the way to do it:


Subtly, very casually make a comment about her appearance next time you see her. Something like: “You really look awesome in that dress” It doesn’t seem like much, but it can change how she sees you. Making simple statements like this can make her begin thinking differently about you. Just don’t blow it by confessing that you’ve been in love with her for 5 years. If you want to be really bold, which I do recommend, then when you are alone with her say something like, You know what? You are actually kinda sexy It should seem like this was a new realization for you. You don’t want her to think that you’ve always had a hard-on for her.


Start touching her more. Start slowly with casual touching and notice how she responds. If she seems to like it, then keep going. I made a video about how to touch, and the link is down in the description. Remember to take away the touch. Don’t let it linger. That’s just creepy. 


Start slowly adding some sensual tension to the mix. It doesn’t have to be obvious. Just casually turn the conversation to intimate topics, so she begins to see you as a romantic man.  You can ask if she has ever kissed another girl or tell her a crazy story about a girl you slept with. If you’ve already started to establish a flirtier vibethe barrier to make such comments will drop as she’s now used to your more flirty attitude.

Make your move

Casually showing your interest, increasing your touching, and creating sensual tension by talking about sex often can morph the tone of the relationship over time. And if you are getting good indicators that she likes your new flirty demeanor, it’s time to make your move.

I recommend going for a kiss when you are alone with her in a sexually charged environment like a bar, club or party.

The kiss should not just come out of nowhere. Make sure you are flirting with her, and she is being receptive. A great time to do it is while you are dancing.

So start being more flirty over time.  Don’t move too fast or it might scare her.

That’s very important to remember.

If that doesn’t work and she’s still not interested then just move on and start meeting more women. It’s her loss anyway.

Now if you just want to be better with women, we created a “Free Escalation Cheat Sheet” that lists out some of our best ways to spark sensual tension, turn a girl on, and escalate to the bedroom.

It’s filled with Advanced Escalation Techniques that will help you turn a platonic – friendly interaction, into a more romantic – “I want to rip your clothes off” vibe.

This is very useful when you’re talking to a girl but it’s going nowhere.

Download the Escalation Cheat Sheet for more on what to say to take things to the next level! 

And if you want us to show you how to meet women personally, click here to check out the live Bootcamp Schedule.

I’m out! Cheers!

Matt Artisan
Intl. Dating Coach & Founder @ The Attractive Man LLC
Matt Artisan is considered one of the World’s Top Dating & Attraction Coaches.

For the last 5 years Matt has personally conducted Live Trainings and Workshops in over 36 countries, helping thousands of men all of the world build confidence and succeed with women.

He has been interviewed by ABC and featured on MTV.
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