The addiction often begins in adolescence, as unearned intimacy becomes a normalized experience. OnlyFans, a social media platform, exemplifies this shift. Unlike platforms that foster connections with friends, OnlyFans allows users to engage with models who share pictures and videos for a subscription fee.
The implications are profound. Reflecting on society a century ago, people were far poorer yet not overwhelmed by antidepressants or a pervasive sense of sadness. The allure of intimacy—even when artificial—drives many men to platforms like OnlyFans, making them dangerously influential.
A staggering 93% of men report exposure to hardcore pornography during adolescence. With such ubiquity, it’s easy to dismiss concerns: “If everyone’s doing it, how bad can it be?” However, the current state of pornography, coupled with the rise of OnlyFans, represents one of the most critical challenges to modern dating dynamics and masculinity.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OC2IwXYPWXI
Pornography fosters unrealistic expectations
Not all women can bend in exaggerated ways, maintain flawless makeup, or deliver mind-blowing, prolonged sexual encounters. Many men internalize these fantasies, imposing them on real relationships. This creates a distorted understanding of intimacy and accidentally damages genuine connections. Men develop rigid ideas about how women should look, perform, and behave, leading to a cycle of dissatisfaction.
The takeover of social media, dating apps, and the ease of accessing adult content has already reshaped modern dating—but OnlyFans amplifies these effects. The known consequences of pornography include objectifying women, desensitizing men to intimacy, reducing arousal with real partners, and creating unrealistic bedroom expectations. Additionally, it depletes dopamine levels, motivation, and overall life satisfaction. Yet, the deeper, long-term consequences are just emerging.
Eric, a coach on my team, shared his insights: “Porn is a super destructive habit. You’re chasing a short dopamine fix. Even when I struggled with women, I didn’t let porn consume me.
Once I learned about its long-term effects—erectile dysfunction, depression, and diminished confidence—I quit for good. That decision transformed my life.”
Using OnlyFans often avoids the challenges of real-word connections.
Consider this scenario: you’re in a relationship and discover your partner subscribes to OnlyFans. Is it a red flag? Absolutely. Relationships thrive on authenticity and intimacy, not on false connections. With over 187 million users, OnlyFans thrives by exploiting men’s innate needs for respect, connection, and sexual fulfillment. The result is a dangerous cycle: temporary relief without addressing underlying issues, ultimately weakening men.
The physical and emotional toll is significant, ranging from erectile dysfunction to an inability to form authentic emotional bonds. Pornography and OnlyFans don’t teach intimacy; they model objectification, perpetuating harmful stereotypes and unattainable expectations.
For centuries, masculinity was defined by overcoming challenges and embracing tension. Approaching a potential partner, for instance, builds confidence and resilience. This process is akin to forging a diamond under immense pressure. However, many men today avoid these growth opportunities, retreating into fantasy worlds crafted by porn and OnlyFans. This trend fosters a generation of men disconnected from reality and weakened by their avoidance of genuine interaction.
The solution?
Stop feeding the monster. Instead, work on becoming the best version of yourself. Ask yourself: What kind of person do I want to be? What kind of life do I want to live? Real change comes from letting go of harmful habits and stepping out of your comfort zone. By doing so, you can forge genuine connections and reclaim your masculinity.
That’s what my team and I help men achieve. We guide them through breaking free of shame, self-doubt, and limiting beliefs to become confident, attractive, and authentic. Our coaching program not only helps you overcome addiction but also provides a supportive community to lift you up whenever you stumble.
If you’re ready to take that step, click the link below to apply for our program. Together, we’ll help you build the life you want and the connections you deserve.