Hey guys, Matt Artisan here, this week I sat down with Attractive Man, Dating, and Confidence Coach Lynn M. to discuss whether or not you should approach a girl in public nowadays.
How do I gain confidence to approach girls?
Gain confidence by focusing on a positive mindset and practicing your social skills with low-stakes interactions first. Remember to be respectful, as practice makes perfect, and social skill is an ability you can continuously improve.
Approaching girls in public nowadays can be tricky…
I had a client in Vegas during a seven-day workshop.
We were outside of H&M and this cute girl was standing there, but she looked pissed.
Not only was she ignoring us, but she looked angry.
I think she had her arms crossed and this pissed-off expression on her face.
I told my client to approach her and he looked at me like, “her, seriously?”
As if I’m throwing him under the bus.
But he’s like, “all right”.
And he goes and approaches her.
And it was beautiful because she just opened up, she smiled, they had a great interaction.
And at the end they hugged and parted ways and exchanged contact information.
She was just having a really horrible day and my client completely made her day.
So you never know what could happen.
Even if a girl looks completely as if she doesn’t want to be approached in public, there’s a chance that it can still be an amazing interaction.
Misreading Signals: Why Most Guys Miss Out
Guys are always waiting for some sort of sign of interest.
They’re at a bar or maybe at a cafe and they’re trying to make eye contact with her, but she doesn’t look back.
She’s ignoring him.
And so of course he doesn’t go over and talk to her.
And guys are missing tons of opportunities.
In fact, if I only approached women that gave me some sort of sign of interest and made eye contact with me, I probably would have only approached a very few amount of women in my life, like 10 women in my entire life instead of probably thousands.
because even if a woman is ignoring me, I will still go and approach her in public.
But most guys are looking for all these green flags so that they don’t have to worry about getting rejected.
Should You Approach Anyway? Lynn’s Perspective
I asked Lynn what she thought about this, here’s what she said:
Men are always waiting for those subtle cues or just any kind of signal that it’s okay.
When I was dating and I was on the dating apps and I was hoping to meet someone, and I would go about my day, let’s just say running errands, I wasn’t actively looking to see what men were out there, what men were in my environment that I wanted to come and approach me.
Actually, the opposite is true.
When I was single and I was out running errands, my radar was normally closed off.
And the reason for that was, I knew, that the kind of man that I would really be attracted to would be the kind of man.
that took chances, that was bold, that was more traditionally masculine, that likes to pursue women.
So it didn’t matter how good looking he was, how tall he was, all the common things that a lot of guys think that you need to have in order for women to be attracted and to respond to you.
It didn’t matter how fantastic he seemed or looked on paper.
My signal was completely turned off because as fantastic as he may have been, unless he was the type of man after opportunities and pursued women in terms of like, he went after what he want.
I knew that it wasn’t gonna be a good fit.
Why Boldness Is Attractive to Women:
Up until the guy comes up and talks to me, that’s when my radar opens up.
The Truth About “Signals” and RBF
But before then, there are so many guys that misconstrue signals, like they think she’s just completely turned off to it, or she has RBF, resting bitch face, or she’s in a bad mood.
And all these signals are so often wrong.
You have to just go up there and see.
and find out what she’s like, who she is, take your chance.
Worst thing, she says no.
I asked Lynn: “What if a woman was always giving guys signs of interest, then how would she know that he’s bold, courageous, confident, goes for what he wants, is able to step into tension, all these attractive qualities?”
So literally the fact that a guy can go up and approach a girl in public without getting any signs of interest or indicators.
shows her that he has a lot of attractive qualities.
And also, think about it this way.
High-Value Women Don’t Signal Everyone
You don’t want a woman that’s constantly giving every guy an indicator that she was open and approachable and available, right?
If you’re looking for something a little bit more serious or if you’re looking for a higher value woman, a woman that’s more selective, a woman that’s more picky, that’s harder to get.
you’re gonna want her to go about her day being a little bit more reserved, having that energy shut off.
The Final Answer: Yes, Approach Girls in Public
so answer is yES, you definitely should approach girls in public
So the lesson here is the ABA rule.
Always be approaching.
How to Become a Man Who Can Approach Anywhere
Look man, if you wanna be the kind of guy that can approach girls in public anywhere, despite the fact.
that they might be ignoring you or not giving you any signs of interest so that you can go on instant dates, dates right then and there with women that you’re really attracted to, then click the link down below and apply for our coaching program, where we’ll take you out in person to meet women together, we’ll mic you up, we’ll give you feedback on your interactions so that you can stop doing the things that aren’t working and pushing women away, and finally start doing the things that draw women to you.
We even bring in models.
for you to role play with so they can give you feedback on how you’re being, whether you’re coming off like kind of weird or creepy, or if you’re coming off in a way that really turns you on, and would help you become that kind of man that can turn women on anytime, any place. And honestly, it almost feels like a superpower.
when you have that ability.
So again, if you want us to work with you so you can start getting more dates with women that you’re really excited about, then click here and I’ll see you at our next workshop.
Frequently Asked Questions
The best way is to use a situational opener, commenting naturally on your shared environment or asking a light, relevant question. Always read her body language cues to ensure she is receptive, and respect personal boundaries.
Make yourself noticeable by dressing well, owning your space with confident posture, and being social with your group. Establishing a brief, warm eye contact before approaching shows interest and boldness.
The key is using open-ended questions and humor to keep the dialogue flowing naturally. Avoid cheesy pick-up lines; instead, use sincere compliments and genuinely act like a friend to build comfort and rapport.
The “three-day rule” is outdated; the best rule is timing based on the connection you made. Text within 24-48 hours while the conversation is still fresh in her mind, and avoid unnecessary waiting games.